Thursday, February 21, 2013

A little faith will do: My journey so far

November 17, 2012.

I know that this won't be published until much further down the road, but I want to at least write some things down and remember how I am feeling and what I am thinking right now. I'm sorry it is so long. But I know I will cherish this one day.

Today I told my family that I am going on a mission! I've been thinking about it a lot lately and told my roommates but now it is official! Today as Lindsay and I were driving to the Salt Lake temple for Aubrey's wedding she turned to me and said "Mel I'm going on a mission!" I then looked at her and said, "Linds I have an appointment with the Bishop on tuesday to start my papers!!!" Needless to say we had a little bit of a freak out and talked about it the rest of the day. I couldn't be happier to have one of my very best friends by my side during this adventure.

About a year ago I was thinking pretty seriously about a mission. I was gonna be 21 and not dating anyone so I felt it was my responsibility. I prayed a lot about it but never got a real answer. I enrolled in a mission prep class to feel things out and just in case I decided to go. It was my absolute favorite class I have ever taken at BYU. My professor was nothing short of amazing. BUT.. that didn't mean that was my answer. I was praying a lot about it and one day in class I received my answer (or so I thought). We had a whole days lecture on sister missionaries and whether girls should serve or not. He said "if you don't have a desire to serve, then don't. It is not your obligation or calling. It is the responsibility of the young men. But don't get me wrong, sister missionaries are needed and they can do things and reach people that the elders can't." Right then a huge burden was lifted from me. Quite frankly I had no desire to serve. I wanted to get married and start a family instead. I wanted to go to pharmacy school and I knew I had years of schooling ahead of me so I decided to focus on my schooling.

A lot of uncertainty about my future has plagued me for the past couple of months and I've been praying lots about what I should do. Last spring I started not feeling so great about Pharmacy school. I talked to my parents about my concerns and started leaning away from it. But in May I decided to take a huge leap of faith and enroll for the PCAT (pharmacy school entrance exam). My test date was scheduled for September. I bought a whole ton of books to study and started taking pharmacy seriously again. Well come August, nothing felt right. I didn't want to take the PCAT and quite frankly I was not prepared nor did I have any free time to get prepared. I was taking a full load of summer classes and working full time. Nothing was feeling right. I wasn't dating. I had lost all desire to go to pharmacy school. I was looking into other careers and options but nothing was feeling right. I was praying about what career path I should take or what I should do after graduation (as it was only months away) and I was not getting any answers. I considered moving home and transferring to Weber State to pursue more medical classes. I considered staying in provo and working full time at Target for awhile. I considered going to grad school. I considered it all. Finally the thought of a mission came. I thought and pondered on the idea and it all made sense. In my mission prep class we learned that we get three answers when we pray: a yes, a no, or a hold. My previous answer I had received had been a yes, but hold. I wasn't ready back then. Things happened in my life that I needed to experience and accomplish before I went on a mission. A big thing was my knee surgery. And I will graduate with my bachelors degree before I go.

I had kind of joked with my family about going on a mission but to be quite honest I was being selfish. I didn't want to sacrifice things like seeing my only brother get his mission call and be at his farewell. I didn't want to miss his senior year of basketball or graduation. I didn't want to miss my sister trying out for high school cheer. I didn't want to miss all of my friends' weddings. But then I realized that my life can't revolve around other people. I have MY LIFE to live. I can't sit around waiting for things to happen to other people. I need to make things happen for myself. Then the age change occurred during General Conference and that was it. I didn't have to miss my brother getting his call and leaving, we could go together!!

I have never felt so good and so sure about a specific decision I have made. I am so excited for what is in store for me and the many experiences and opportunities ahead! I know that a mission is not something I will regret and my life will be changed because of it.

Right now I'm loving Alma 26.

vs 1-4 Talks about why we have reason to rejoice and that is because we have been so blessed with the opportunity to be instruments in the hands of God to bring about this great work.

vs 3 ...And this is the blessing which hath been bestowed upon us, that we have been made instruments in the hands of God to bring about this great work.

vs 27 ...Go amongst thy brethren, and bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success.
vs 29 And we have entered into their houses and taught them, and we have taught them in their streets; yea, and we have taught them upon their hills; and we have also entered into their temples and their synagogues and taught them; and we have been cast out, and mocked, and spit upon, and smote upon our cheeks; and we have been stoned, and taken and bound with strong cords, and cast into prison; and through the power and wisdom of God we have been delivered again

vs 30 And we have suffered all manner of afflictions, and all this, that perhaps we might be the means of saving some soul; and we supposed that our joy would be full if perhaps we could be the means of saving some


So here's to saving some souls!

November 20.

Things are moving fairly quickly, but I love it! I wish they could go faster but since I will be graduating in April my availability date is my rate-determining step here. But tonight I meet with the Bishop to start my papers! I'm thrilled. I then have a dentist appointment tomorrow and my mission physical! After those are complete I will basically be done since my wisdom teeth are already gonzo. I've started telling a few select people, but still keeping it pretty hushed! I've also been watching the BYUtv series "the district". It's about 8 missionaries serving in San Diego and their experiences. I'm obsessed! It makes me so excited to get out and serve!

December 6.

Well things took a little bit longer than anticipated to finally get my papers started. I had to wait for my provo bishop and my home ward bishop to talk and settle things about who would be my funding ward and so forth before I could officially start. I  got the email that I was good to go one week ago! And now my papers are all done! I just have to scan my passport, drivers license and add a picture!!!! Now it is just the waiting game! I'm still deciding exactly when I'm going to put them in, but I'm still hoping for the 18th! We'll see. I've been telling a few more people.. Not awesome supportive reactions so far, but I don't care :)

December 14.

I have submitted my application to the Bishop. 6 days ago in fact... Just waiting to hear back. Sure wish I was dealing with some proactive people, but I guess they don't have the next 18 months of their life hanging on a cloud of uncertainty so they don't care. If I can get ahold of my bishop and talk about my papers and then meet with the stake pres on sunday then TUESDAY should be the big day... 4 days :) Still deciding how to tell all my family! I really wish things were going a little bit more smoothly. It is making me kind of question things... But if I'm not supposed to go then I know I'll be stopped.

December 28.

Update. Obviously things aren't going as planned...... My stake is a real pain. I had an appointment scheduled and then they canceled it and never rescheduled. I'm ticked. But oh well. I'm trying to have faith and remember that the Lord knows what he is doing. My papers probably won't go in for like 2 weeks, but then my parents are going out of town so i'm going to wait... for my brother! So that we get our calls on the same day and open them together!! It will be AWESOME! Papers go in January 27th and hopefully we get our calls on February 13th!

January 17th.

Wow, time is flying. I can't believe I made my first post on this page two months ago today. And I've known about a mission for even longer than that. Well things are still on track for the above plan. Except I changed my availability date to June 1st so that we can maybe fit in a family trip after my brother graduates from high school. I finally met with my stake president and got my papers ALL finished. Shew. It's about time!! He was really great though and gave me some good advice. Like reading chapter one of preach my gospel 5 times before I go into the MTC.  I am getting so super anxious. None of my extended family knows yet. We are still planning on it being a surprise for them when Mason opens his call. I really just want to know where I am going and have the news be out. This is big guys, this is life changing. Patience is probably the biggest thing I've been tried with so far. I'm still not any good at it but I'm definitely trying!

January 26.

Less than a week till takeoff! Wahoooo! I am getting so anxious it is ridiculous! I keep having crazy dreams about my mission and places I will go. Last night I was doing some homework for my D&C class and I had to read section 84. I honestly cringed when I saw that it was 120 verses but I knew I had to read it all before I took my quiz so I sighed real deep and started reading.

Wow. Talk about the section just for me at this time. I completely got emotional as i was reading. So many verses on missionary work. I even found the scripture that I want to put on my plaque that will hang in the church! Here are some of my favorites:

86 Therefore, let no man among you, for this commandment is unto all the faithful who are called of God in the church unto the ministry, from this hour take purse or scrip, that goeth forth to proclaim this gospel of the kingdom.

 87 Behold, I send you out to reprove the world of all their unrighteous deeds, and to teach them of a 
judgment which is to come.

 88 And whoso receiveth you, there I will be also, for I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up.
 94 Nevertheless, search diligently and spare not; and wo unto that house, or that village or city that rejecteth you, or your words, or your testimony concerning me.


This week for mission prep I had to memorize the "purpose" of a missionary and D&C 4. And I have to recite them in class next week.
Pupose: To invite others to come unto Christ by helping them receive the restored gospel through faith in Jesus Christ and his Atonement, repentance, baptism, receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end.
D&C 4: Now behold a great and a marvelous work is about to come forth among the children of men. Therefore, O ye that embark in the service of God, see that ye serve Him with all of your heart, might, mind and strength that ye may stand blameless before God at the last day. Therefore, if ye have desires to serve God, ye are called to the work. And behold the field is white already to harvest and lo, he that thrusteth in his sickle with his might, the same layeth up in store that he perisheth not, but bringeth salvation to his soul. And faith, hope, charity and love with an eye single to the glory of God qualify him for the work. Remember faith, virtue, knowledge, temperance, patience, brotherly kindness, godliness, charity, humility, diligence. Ask and ye shall receive, knock and it shall be opened unto you. Amen.
The church is true :)
Lindsay got her call!!!!! Watch out Birmingham, England!
February 1, 2013.
My papers are in. My papers are in. MY PAPERS ARE IN!!!!!!! I cannot begin to tell you how happy that makes me. I have been waiting for this for A LONG TIME... We aren't sure if Mason will be able to meet with the stake president in time to get his in this weekend so that will be a bummer. But no more waiting for me!!! TWO WEEKS! (hopefully. I don't have patience for any longer!!)
February 20, 2013.
To say that an update is needed is an understatement. Turns out my papers didn't go in on the first. Of course they didn't. That is exactly how my luck has been. To be honest, when I asked my Bishop if they had been put in and he checked and told me that they were still with the stake president I felt as if the world was ending and I had just been stabbed with a very large knife. I was fighting back tears. He also told me not to call my stake pres and to just be patient and to call the Prophet if I wanted it done faster. (I was definitely not in the mood for that smart remark).
 I went home and cried to my mom. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! I wasn't at ease for the next three days. My mind was everywhere. How was I supposed to know when they went in? What if in a month I still didn't have a call? THEN could I call my stake? Shoot. I was NOT a happy camper to say the least. I had Mason text my bishop at home and asked him the status. THEY WERE IN. They officially went in on the 4th. Great! So I was still planning on the 13th. I was a lot more calm. 
I also ended up telling all of my extended family. It was the best decision I ever made. They were all so supportive and I cried every time I got a response. Then I text my bishop on Saturday to ask what the status was. He said they were with church headquarters and a call was ready to be assigned. DANG IT!!!!!  I was expecting my call that next wednesday!! Well not anymore. SO then my mind switches to the 20th. The next wednesday. It HAD to come that day. Then I realize there is a holiday on monday with no mail..... So then I plan on the 21st. I got my work schedule changed and planned for that day. I got word from my bishop that my call had in fact been assigned and it was on its way to me. So I emailed family, texted friends and my mama ordered cupcakes. 
Well folks, my mother opened the mailbox today and bam. What do you know? The church don't care bout no monday holiday! MY CALL IS HEREEEEEEEE. and here i sit in provo while my call sits at home in Eden on the mantel...... TOMORROW IS THE DAY!!!! I'm so relieved. I took two Tylenol PM's so that I can sleep tonight :)
The church is true and I know no matter where I am called it is 100% where I am supposed to be. From Colorado Springs to Boise I am ready and so incredibly excited for it. The Lord has definitely had His hand in the timing of everything and I trust him with all of my heart.

February 21, 2013.
Dear Sister Miles:
You are hereby called to serve as a missionary of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. You are assigned to labor in the North Carolina Charlotte Mission!!!!!!!!
I leave June 26th, English speaking!

I couldn't be happier.